Perseverance

When I was in Secondary School, I took part in the Duke of Edinburgh scheme and part of this was to trek up the Mournes of Northern Ireland (pictured below). If you have read any of my blogs so far you will know that despite my quite introverted personality, I am determined and quite

head strong. There was about fifty or so other pupils taking part, including my best friend, who was one of the popular girls in our year, very beautiful and smart. All the girls taking part or a great majority of them, wore the best that money could buy, they brought with them gorgeous wellie boots, coats and so forth, where as I, quite tom boyish and not really at one with fashion, literally looked like I lived in the back of beyond, with huge, ugly, green wellies and a coat, two times too big for my petite frame, wild and unruly hair and braces. I knew this trip for me personally was going to be hell, hell in that I was to partner with the girls in my year that liked to make my life a misery. I suppose I was really fortunate to have my best friend with me, she acted as a buffer and someone my foes seemed to accept.

Long story short, on one of are longer hikes up the mountains, I somehow lacked behind everyone else and to add to the humiliation, one of my feet got stuck in a huge puddle of mud and sheep bones and so my wellie got stuck and my foot slipped out of it and I fell backwards into another mass of mud and sheep bones and it began to really rain. Mist was gathering upon the mountains and my group was out of sight, and I was crying my eyes out, lost, cold and really quite done out, having not slept a wink during the night. I was quite used to coming last and really it never pained me that much, because in the end I was making high marks in my work and reading like a trogon. But on that particular day it did. I felt an immense weight of pain, as though all the humiliation I had felt during my school life had suddenly fallen upon my shoulders and so my tears were hot and raw.

That was when I simply withered away…

Wrong!

I mean I could have simply waited it out until someone recognized that I was missing, I could have had a fine day out with the baaing sheep that surrounded me or I could have simply wandered about on my own. But something powerful inside gave me strength and that was the first time in my teenage life where I thought to myself ‘Fuck it!”. I would be the laughing stock of the whole trip if I merely subjected myself to the same humiliation, but not that time. Yes, I had a good two miles to walk if I was to catch up with the rest of the group and yes I would only have one welly in which to aid my pursuit, but I got up and focused on the end point, way up high on the slopes of a mountain and I began to walk with determination and perseverance. That strength somehow carried me on, even as the rain hardened and I grew cold. I followed the footsteps of my group and in time I managed to find them and not only find them, but lead them towards the end goal, with one incredibly wet and cold leg, soaking hair and chattering teeth. It was perhaps the first time in my life where I had pushed myself. In the end they still laughed at me, but I didn’t care, getting to the top was my goal and I did and boy was it worth it. And the ironic thing about this adventure was that as I stood upon the mountain overlooking Newcastle, rays of sunlight broke apart the grey sky above and warmed me.

So…

When I was designing Eveline’s character and putting together her story, I wanted her to be determined and strong. I knew before I put pen to paper that her journey among the journeys of other prominent characters was going to be absolute hell, with periods of sunshine in between, but in general it would be tough. But I think that is what I have come to respect in Eveline, her incredible courage and perseverance. And to be honest, being a writer and all that that includes asks for the same tools. It is a tough journey you find yourself on, with so many daily challenges that knock your confidence. You are not only moulding and developing your next novel but you are having to put all your energy and time into creating a group of avid followers, selling your previous novel and keeping up to date with your social presence. It takes strength, passion, devotion and perseverance to get to that end goal. But try to simplify your goals, don’t allow them to grow to big, so much so that they destroy you as a writer. I always end my day, happy and content if even one person has read my blog or bought my book, because just to know that someone else is sharing in Eveline’s journey is an achievement.

To conclude…

If you are an author like me, small and pretty much invisible to the rest of the world, I urge you never to give up. Your story, your gift and your art have the possibility of changing someone’s life, including your own. You may find yourself stuck on a metaphorical mountain of mud and sheep’s bone, but that doesn't mean that you simply allow the mud to swallow you up. Get up and start hiking up that slope and you will feel all the better for it.

‘Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained…’ Marie Curie.

Iseult x